a thick band of gray, a line that elides the end of day into the beginning of night

a thick band of gray, a line that elides the end of day into the beginning of night (2005)

For singer and Max/MSP (with SPAT and La Kitchen sensors)
When I visited my grandfather as he was dying, bedridden and comatose, I was affected by what I read as signs of communication: motoric animation, irregular breathing, changes of heartbeat. This foreign language of physical gestures transcribes that which we want to interpret as signs of life continuing. In this piece, by using real-time sensors on my body and my voice, I want to investigate that gray line between language/gesture and non-semantic sound/movement. The poetics of the piece extend, through physical action, my poem written upon returning home from seeing my grandfather alive for the last time.

What I see is a thick band of gray
a line that elides the end of day
into the beginning of night
the space
between
stretched out over many years
perhaps a lifetime,
when we begin
we are already beginning
to end

That gray band
is in the motoric animation
of the lower jaw gnawing
regular pulsations
at the upper lip -
the space
left vacant by absent dentures;
the tight grip -
that obscures the sheet's edge
into the hand;
the irregular breathing -
in which are lost
traces almost words;
the increased heart rate -
seemingly responding
to proximity;
the eyes -
a miracle of human effort opening
in coincidence to
one calling
his name

This foreign language
of physical gestures
recorded, on this day,
a gray band
transcribing
in what little we can
understand
our hopes
that which
we want to
interpret as
signs of
life
continuing...

Link to watch video: http://www.kenueno.com/qt/1KensHydraPerformancestream.mov